So – the thing that’s happening? Here’s where I’ve been

I think it’s an understatement to say the world has been turned upside down. If you are reading this – you probably aren’t able to sit inside a restaurant or find toilet paper.

We are now in the era of social distancing and watching the numbers spike.

I work in the news business. If you’ve read my posts in the past – I make no secret about that. I love what I do. My official title is Digital Executive Producer. I’ve been lucky enough to be able to shift my operation and do my job from home. I say lucky in a very serious way. So many people are living an uncertain future.

Here’s the thing. I’m having a hard time. When I was younger – like much younger…middle school age I had some serious struggles with mental health. I’ve had anxiety spike over the years and been able to handle it. Right now however – I’m having a hard time.

I haven’t had a good night of sleep in a couple of weeks…with a couple of nights with one to two hours of sleep. I’ve been eating so much crap food.

My work day is being glued to virus coverage. Listening to daily briefings. Updating numbers. Watching and writing about people struggle to keep their life’s dream, a small business open, or the people that are on the front lines worried about getting sick.

KNN gives me joy. I love writing about my kid. It’s been a fun outlet for the last few years. I plan to go back to writing about the fun soon. But lately – I’ve been in a black hole. Stuff I’ve loved doing…I just don’t have the energy or desire to do it.

I write all of this knowing I’m far from alone. Also knowing I’m lucky to have what I have in my life. My wife, Alex, a job that keeps me busy doing something I enjoy, friends, family, coworkers. But this whole thing – the unknown…the worst case scenario stories…the 18 months until a vaccine. It is hard.

I didn’t want to write this. I wanted to ignore this page for a while…because it makes me happy. And as I type that – I realize that might be the dumbest sentence I’ve ever written. And I’ve had some pretty embarrassing typos in my professional life. But I’m going to go back to format after this. I need some normalcy and this is a great place to start.

I don’t want you to feel bad for me. I want hot to know you’re not alone – if you feel this way. So many people hide their feelings. I’m one of them most of the time. This one though? It’s worth talking about.

I want to hear from you. If you take the time to read this – and you’d like someone to talk to…shoot me a message. I would love to hear from you, and yes, selfishly it would likely brighten my day.

Now – back to format soon. In day seven of isolation – I have unlimited stories about Alex.

One thought on “So – the thing that’s happening? Here’s where I’ve been

  1. I’m not quite sure how/why your post from March dropped into my reader TODAY, but I am so glad it did. I hope things are looking up, and that you’ve found a way to sleep. I hit rock bottom 6-8 weeks ago, and found that eliminating my “comfort foods” carbs, sugar, alcohol (beer is food) actually helped me feel better. I’ve been backsliding lately, and I can definitely feel the difference (mentally and physically).


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